the mental hospital was actually pretty fun all in all, i went there on a monday, it all happened in fourth period, when i was called up, spent the wholeeeeeeeeeee school day in the office waiting for them to call my mom, and when they did, ugh long story short my mom cried alot i just kinda stood there and felt really heartless because all in all i kinda didnt care, and by kinda i mean I DIDNT, guess thats why i really hate myself.

i feel guilty not because i hurt people or do anything, i feel guilty just for feeling that i should be guilty when im really not

anyway long story short, i cried like once and immediately stopped crying after i got in, i guess im not the worst when it comes to manipulating my own emotions to make other percieve me. soo at around 7 or 8 i entered the hospital!

honestly i felt high the entire time i was there, and i wasnt even taking meds or anything, i met a girl whos name is pronounced Sha-N-Elle, im not sure if thats how you spell it but it might also be the same way its pronounced, she was a super cool genderfluid lesbian girl, i didnt talk much but, on the last two days for once i didnt feel so insecure, i didnt feel like i hated my mentality, and it was actually kinda fun, lmao i remember i snorted sugar up my nose like twice as a joke

all in all the reason i think i loved it was because